Harry Potter- Broadway Style
by E.M.C
Summary: EPISODE SEVEN NOW UP! After Snape drinks the wrong potion he turns into super-scary-singing-Snape.
1. Episode One: Spectacular Spectacular

A/N: This is a musical HP fanfic with some twists. I suggest SINGING, not reading it. Have fun ;)  
  
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*Slytherin and Gryffindor are in Potions Class- when suddenly Snape drinks Draco's-gone-wrong-experiment. Instead of transforming Snape into a-super- stellar-Snape, it turned him into a slightly-scary-singing-Snape! OH NO!*  
  
  
  
*After groans, moans, and other gruelling noises are heard from Snape- he suddenly jumps on Draco's desk ready to tap dance*  
  
Draco- *talking* Professor Snape, are you...er...alright?  
  
Snape- *talking* No! Anyone?!?- has anyone heard of...  
  
*begins to sing*  
  
Jekyll Jekyll Hyde, Jekyll Hyde Hyde Jekkyl!  
  
Jekyll Jekyll Hyde, Jekyll HYDDDEEE!  
  
*whole class joins but Draco whose is watching in disgust and a tad embarrased.*  
  
Jekyll Jekyll Hyde, Jekyll Hyde Hyde Jekkyl!  
  
Draco- *nudges Crabbe and Goyle* What are you two duds doing?!?  
  
Crabbe- Ah, sorry...  
  
Goyle- It's just kinda catchy!  
  
Class- Jekyll Jekyll Hyde, Jekyll HYDDDEEE!  
  
*SUDDENLY VOLDEMORT barges into classroom, pulling Profesor Quirrel by the back of his turban.*  
  
*Class gasps*  
  
Professor Quirrel- P-p-please don't h-hurt me.  
  
Ron- *whispeers* That stutter is so f-f-fake.  
  
*Just as Voldemort is about to unleash his wrath, it seems the potion has someone rubbed off on him too.*  
  
Voldemort- *sings* Thought that I'd be weak without you, but I'm stronger.  
  
*It seems only words of song will come from his mouth, and actions of dance from his shaking self.*  
  
Voldemort- *breaks out in Destiney's Child song and dance*  
  
I'm a survivor  
  
I'm not gon give up  
  
I'm not gon stop  
  
I'm gon work harder  
  
I'm a survivor  
  
I'm gonna make it  
  
I will survive  
  
Keep on survivin'  
  
*Wormtail somehow, finds himself beside Voldemort, with- OH MY LORDY!*  
  
Hermione- *speaking* What is he wearing?  
  
Ron- *speaking* Is that a thong over his cloak?  
  
Harry- *speaking* No way!!! EWWW!!!  
  
Wormtail- *hands the bongos to Quirrel who starts playing the beat of "I'm a Slave for You".*  
  
*sings* I'm a SLLAAVVVEEE for you! *dances by Voldemort*  
  
I'm not trying to hide it  
  
I'm a slllaaaaaaaaavveeee for you!  
  
Harry- *speaking* This is enough!  
  
*sings* I'VE COME TO SAVE THE DAY!  
  
Voldemort- *sings* Shut-up or we'll fight!  
  
Harry- *sings* For the right-  
  
Both Voldemort and Harry- *singing* TOO PARTTYYYY!!!  
  
You gotta fight! (DUN DA)  
  
For the right! (DUN DA)  
  
To PARRRTTYYY!  
  
*All the students and teachers and villians in the Potions Room get off their booty and dance and sing- except DRACO that is. He's left at his desk all alone.*  
  
Draco- *speaking* Crabbe? Doyle?  
  
Everyone but Draco- *singing* You gotta fight! For the right! To PARRTTYYY!  
  
Draco- *speaking* Where's Crabbe? Where's Doyle? RRR!!! FINE!!!  
  
*begins to snap his fingers. Sings* Where's all my soul sistas? Lemme hear ya flow sistas.  
  
Crabbe and Doyle- *singing* Hey sista go, sista flow, sista go sista.  
  
Draco- *sings looking at Harry* Quit playing games with my heart!!!!  
  
Harry- *is silent...looks at poor lil'Draco and sings* Why can't we be friends?  
  
*sings to Snape* Why can't we be friends?  
  
*turns and sings to Voldemort* Why can't we be friends?  
  
*Voldemort, Draco, and Snape all shed tears, and break into song.*  
  
WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS? WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS? WHY CAN'T BE FRIENDS?  
  
*THEN- suddenly the potions wears off. Snape is mid-bear hug with Voldemort. Draco, Crabbe, and Doyle are can-caning. Wormtail is dressed as a school girl.*  
  
Snape- *speaking and scared*...What- whatever just happened, we will all try very hard to forget, okay?  
  
*Everyone nodds and goes about their regular business, afterall it's not too healthy having pictures of Wormtail as Britney Spears and Can-Can Dancers as Crabbe and Doyle.*  
  
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C'EST FINI! Hope you had as much fun reading it, as I did writing! =^_^= MWAHAHAHA! P.s. Reviews are welcome! 


	2. Episode Two: Wizard of Hogs- A Musical H...

A/N: Since my first chapter seemed quite popular- I decided to put up another one. THANKS for all of your reviews! I read all the reviews and appreciate them greatly- that's why I'm putting up another chapter.  
  
I recommend NOT reading this but SINGING it aloud (believe me- if you can pull any sense out of this fanfic, singing's the way to do it.) Have fun ;)  
  
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*Harry Potter is on his broom- after that quick, lil'bugger of a snitch. It's a big game- against Slytherin no less.*  
  
  
  
Lee Jordan- Potter sees the snitch! GO POTTER! *looks at McGonagall glaring* Opps, I mean go teams...I have no bias what-so- ever...and...er...  
  
  
  
*UP! DOWN! LEFT! RIGHT! Harry goes after the snitch. He is so focused, he hardly notices the-*  
  
  
  
Lee Jordan- BLUDGER! Harry look out! *recieves glares from professors.* I mean...er...um...  
  
  
  
WHACK!  
  
  
  
*Harry, hit by the bludger falls off his broom onto the field. He begins to see little, baby owls and stars flying around his head.*  
  
  
  
~Cheers (mostly Slytherin)...Owls...Stars....Cheers...BLACKNESS....~  
  
  
  
*Harry passes out on the Quidditch field, the cheers drowned out by complete darkness and silence...*  
  
  
  
~UNTIL...  
  
  
  
Voice- We're gonna take yeh down.  
  
Deep down to the front lines.  
  
  
  
*Harry was almost sure he had heard that voice before...Why it was Hagrid! But...What was he talking about? Why was there music in the background?...Harry thought he must still be dreaming and he slowly opened his eyes.*  
  
  
  
*Harry shooke his head. Sure enough- it was Hagrid leaning over him...But- where was he? Harry was most certainly not on the Quidditch playing field anymore, or in the infirmary. He looked around. He was in a room with white tile, yet couldn't see any walls or even a ceiling! Pink smoke appeared and covered the floor around him. How odd!*  
  
  
  
Hagrid- Hullo Harry! Glad to see yeh awake!  
  
  
  
Harry- Huh? Where am I? Why is there music in the background? Why- Why are you DANCING Hagrid!  
  
  
  
*Hagrid was breaking down to "The Soprano's Theme Song." He was appearing to do a dance that was partially John Travolta: Saturday Night Fever, and partially the funky chicken.*  
  
  
  
Harry- Hagrid?!? Um...er...What happened?  
  
  
  
Hagrid- Well...*grabs microphone out of the air and starts to sing*  
  
  
  
Woke up this morning  
  
Got yerself a wand.  
  
  
  
Yer mama always said  
  
Yer'd be the chosen one.  
  
  
  
Harry- *speaking* What? My mom? She said that?  
  
  
  
*Hagrid grabs Harry to join in on the dance that appeared to be a weird mix of the Macerena and Ring a Round the Rosie.*  
  
  
  
Hagrid- *sings*  
  
  
  
She said yer one in a million  
  
Yeh gotta sing and shout.  
  
  
  
Born to the bad side.  
  
With the green moon in yer eyes!  
  
  
  
  
  
Harry- *stops dancing and speaks* WHAT?!? I wasn't born to the bad side? My eyes are green- but I WASN'T BORN TO THE BAD SIDE!!!  
  
  
  
*As Harry is caught flabbergasted, Hermione and Ron appear in the smoke.*  
  
  
  
Harry- Hermione? Ron? What are you guys doing here? Do you know what's going on?  
  
  
  
Hermione- *giggles* Of course, I am Hermione- or did you forget?  
  
  
  
Ron- Just follow us Harry!  
  
  
  
Harry- What?  
  
  
  
*Hermione loops her arm around Harry's and Ron takes the other free arms. They begin to skip and hum the tune of "The Yellow Brick Road" from The Wizard of Oz.*  
  
  
  
Harry- Huh? Where are you taking me? Why are we skipping?  
  
  
  
*A yellow brick road forms in front of Harry's feet.*  
  
  
  
Hermione and Ron- *sing*  
  
  
  
Follow the yellow brick road  
  
Follow the yellow brick road  
  
Follow, follow, follow, follow  
  
Follow the yellow brick road  
  
  
  
Harry- WHY? Why are you singing ? Why are we following this road? Why ME?!?  
  
  
  
Hermione and Ron- *singing*  
  
  
  
We're off to see the wizard  
  
The wonderful wizard of Hogs  
  
Because Because Because Because Becauseeeeeeee  
  
Because of the wonderful things he does  
  
  
  
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~ Meanwhile, as the gang skips down the yellow brick road, Sirius Black is sitting in Azkaban, behind bars.~  
  
  
  
Sirius- *singing Fiona Apple's Criminal*  
  
  
  
All I need is a good defense,  
  
Cause I'm feeling like a criminal!  
  
  
  
*OPPS! WRONG SCENE FOLKS!*  
  
  
  
*AH! HERE WE ARE: Meanwhile, as the gang skips down the yellow brick road, Voldemort is recruiting new Death Eaters. Crabbe, and Goyle are among the new recruits.*  
  
  
  
Voldemort- *singing the Lion King song "Be Prepared"*  
  
  
  
It's clear that your powers of retation  
  
Are as wet as a warthogs backside.  
  
  
  
Goyle- *speaking* Hey! Did he jus make fun of us?!?  
  
  
  
Voldemort- *continuing singing*  
  
  
  
But thick as you are- PAY ATTENTION!  
  
My words are a matter of pride!  
  
  
  
It's clear from your vacant expressions.  
  
The lights a little off upstairs.  
  
  
  
Crabbe- *speaking* Hey, I tink he jus made fun of us again.  
  
  
  
Voldemort- *continues singing still*  
  
  
  
But we're talking king to succession.  
  
Even YOU can't be caught unaware!  
  
  
  
BE PREPARED!!!  
  
  
  
Goyle- Be prepared? For what?!?  
  
  
  
Voldemort- FOR THE DEATH OF THE HEADMASTER!  
  
  
  
Crabbe- Why? Are we going to kill him?  
  
  
  
Voldemort- *nodds* And Harry too.  
  
  
  
Goyle- Great idea! Who needs the headmaster?  
  
  
  
Both Crabbe and Goyle- No profs! No profs! Na na na na na!  
  
  
  
Voldemort- IDIOTS! There will be a headmaster!  
  
  
  
Crabbe- But you said that-  
  
  
  
Voldemort- I will be HEADMASTER! Stick with me- and you'll never get F's again! *mummbles* Will maybe you too...  
  
  
  
Crabbe and Goyle- YAY! LONG LIFE THE HEADMASTER! LONG LIFE!  
  
  
  
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~ Back to Harry and Gang...~  
  
  
  
Harry- Okay! I have had enough! We have been skipping down this darn road for nearly two hours- singing the same darn song- and haven't gone anywhere! Did we take a wrong turn?  
  
  
  
Hermione- *sniffles back her tears*  
  
  
  
Ron- Oh no! Hermione's got us lost!  
  
  
  
Hermione- *her whimpers quickly turn into song*  
  
  
  
If I could turn back time.  
  
  
  
  
  
Harry- NO! Don't get started on the Cher, Hermione!  
  
  
  
*Hermione quickly shut's her mouth, but not because of Harry- but because Voldemort has suddenly appeared.*  
  
  
  
Voldemort- *in big, manly, scary voice* I've come to fight, Harry! This is where it ends!  
  
  
  
Harry- Really? You've came to fight?  
  
  
  
Voldemort- Yeah...er...I mean *in scary voice* Yes, I have.  
  
  
  
Harry- Really? You wanna go?  
  
  
  
Voldemort- YES!  
  
  
  
Harry- Uh huh! Let's go then!  
  
  
  
Voldemort- Glad you've finally accepted Harry, let's fight!  
  
  
  
Harry- Nuh uh! You wanna go- you can leave! Just have fun finding a door!  
  
  
  
Voldemort- What?!? You've tricked me! You built me up and just let me down...Why-  
  
  
  
Ron- *whispers* I feel a song coming on.  
  
  
  
Voldemort- *grabs his microphone and flicks on the music "Build Me Up"  
  
  
  
Why do you build me up?  
  
  
  
Hermione, Ron, Crabbe and Goyle- *snapping fingers, swaying back in forth and singing*  
  
  
  
Build me up!  
  
  
  
Voldemort- Just to let me down  
  
  
  
H, R, C, G- Let me down!  
  
  
  
Voldemort- And mess me around!  
  
  
  
And worst of all!  
  
  
  
The Singing Quartet (Hermione, Ron, Crabbe, and Goyle)- Worst of all!  
  
  
  
Voldemort- You never fight baby when you say you will.  
  
  
  
T.S.Q.- Say you will!  
  
  
  
Voldemort- But I loathe you still!  
  
  
  
*Harry's weirded-out expression turns into a smile at the sight of Voldemort swaying with his four back up dancers.*  
  
  
  
Harry- *singing*  
  
But I need you still!  
  
  
  
Voldemort- *singing*  
  
I need you!  
  
  
  
Harry- *singing*  
  
I need you!  
  
  
  
Voldemort- *singing*  
  
More than anyone darling!  
  
You've that right from the start!  
  
  
  
Harry- *singing*  
  
So build me up  
  
Buttercup  
  
Don't break my HEARTTTTTTTTTT!!!!  
  
  
  
*Suddenly the singing and dancing, and pink smoke swirls...*  
  
  
  
~Pink...Singing...Dancing....Darkness....~  
  
  
  
*Harry faints*  
  
  
  
Voice- Harry! Harry! Are you alright!  
  
  
  
*The voice sounds familiar- it's HERMIONE! And she's NOT SINGING!*  
  
  
  
*Harry opens his eyes to find himself in the infirmary- surronded by Ron, Hermione, and Hagrid.*  
  
  
  
Hagrid- Hullo Harry! Glad to see yeh awake!  
  
  
  
Harry- Oh no! Not again!  
  
  
  
Ron- Not what again?  
  
  
  
Harry- No more singing or dancing or- please NO!  
  
  
  
Hermione- What are you talking about Harry?  
  
  
  
Harry- I just had a strange dream- and you were there Hermione, and you Ron, and you Hagrid!  
  
  
  
Hermione- What about Todo? *laughs*  
  
  
  
Ron/Hagrid- What?!?  
  
  
  
Harry- Muggle movie...Ron, remind me never to go on Napster again!  
  
  
  
  
  
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THEE END! Hope you liked it as much as the first one! Keep reviewing and I'll keep writing=^_^= 


	3. Episode Three: Memory Bubbles

A/N: Oh dear lord no! Here I go again! With another episode of "Harry Potter Broadway Style". Thank you guys so very much for the reviews- I read 'em all and actually listen to 'em. Special thanks goes out to whatever22 for telling me "but the second chapter wasnt that funny cuz i didnt no most of the songs". Thanks for the input! That's why this episode of Harry Potter- Broadway Style features some of the MOST overplayed songs!  
  
  
  
Keep Reviewing, I'll keep on Writing =^_^=  
  
WARNING: Do not read any further- instead SING! (It's much more fun that way!)  
  
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*Back at Gryffindor Common Room, Ron, Hermione, and Harry try to think of their "Most Memorable Hogwarts Moment" a rather odd homework assignment they each were assigned.*  
  
Harry- Hmmm....Do you guys remember Fluffy?  
  
Ron- How could we FORGET? I mean it was a slobbery, three-headed dog.  
  
  
  
*Ron, Hermione, and Harry look at the classic 'memory bubble' forming over their heads. They are brought back to the time they first discovered Fluffy.*  
  
  
  
Hermione- Alohamora! *unlocks door*  
  
*The three walk instead the room- only to find Fluffy! The three-headed dog!*  
  
Harry- AHHHHHHH!!!! *his screams soon turn into song.*  
  
Who let the dogs out?!  
  
Hermione/Ron- *sings* Who, Who, Who, Who  
  
Harry- *singing*  
  
Who let the dogs out?  
  
Fluffy- Woof, Woof, Woof, Woof!  
  
*The three found Fluffy's weak spot- music! Fluffy falls asleep, and the three are safe.*  
  
  
  
*Memory bubble pops*  
  
  
  
Ron- Wait! That's not how it happened!  
  
Harry- Hey, it was my memory!  
  
Ron- Well, remember the time I won the Quidditch Cup?  
  
Harry- Um...er...no...You don't even play Quidditch...  
  
Ron- I, the team captain of Gryffindor brought our team to victory- and all the girls were all over me! "Ron!" they said "Just let me touch your hand!" "Oh Ron! He's so dreamy!"  
  
Hermione- Ron...What are you talking about?  
  
  
  
*Ron's is lost in his memory bubble that is forming.*  
  
*Ron is standing in the Quidditch Field, holding Quidditch cup. The crowd is cheering and there is a pack of fanatical girls standing around him in awe.*  
  
*Right Said Fred's "I'm Too Sexy" starts to play*  
  
Ron- *sings as he struts down from his podium*  
  
I'm too sexy for my shirt  
  
Too sexy for my shirt  
  
So sexy- it hurts!  
  
*Girls scream as Ron tosses his Quidditch cloak off, and continues with his SNL: 'Mango'ish type dance.*  
  
I'm a model- you know what I mean  
  
I like to do my little turn on the catwalk  
  
On the catwalk  
  
I like to do my little turn on the cat.  
  
  
  
*Screaming girls run after Ron- just as Hermione pops his memory bubble*  
  
  
  
Hermione- Ron! That NEVER happened!  
  
Ron- What? Ruin my fun- why don't you!!!  
  
Harry- Well, Hermione- you don't have anything written down yet, surprise surprise.  
  
Ron- Yeah, what's your most memorable Hogwarts moment?  
  
Hermione- When I, Hermione Granger- liberated the House Elves!  
  
  
  
*Hermione's little memory bubble begins to form.*  
  
  
  
*Hermione is surrounded by little elves wearing their own clothes- most dressed Destiney's Child style. Destiney's Child's "Independent Woman" begins to play. Hermione breaks it down with the funky chicken.*  
  
Hermione- *singing*  
  
All the house elves- independent  
  
Throw your socks up at me!  
  
All the mamas making money  
  
Through your socks up at me!  
  
Dobby, I never knew you could get down like that!  
  
Dobby how your house elves get down like that?  
  
Dobby I never knew you could get down like that!  
  
Dobby how your house elves get down like that!  
  
  
  
*Ron and Harry both interrupt Hermione's memory bubble from contining to play.*  
  
Hermione- What?!? Never knew I could shake it, did ya? *does the funky chicken again*  
  
*Ron and Harry do not say anything- only look in sheer disbelief.* 


	4. Episode Four: Attack of the Theme Song

A/N: Thanks for are of your reviews =^_^=  
  
This is EPISODE 4: A Tribute To Theme Songs  
  
EPISODE 5 to follow soon: "Pop!"  
  
Please review- I read 'em all. On your reviews, tell me your fave pop song or least fave pop song so I can add it to Episode Five (thanks to Kate A.K.A. vampirezombiegirl for the pop suggestion).  
  
All thanks to " " for her Annie suggestion- I'm planning on using it in the future ^_^  
  
Keep reviewing ^_^ I'll keep writing...  
  
  
  
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*A Bulgarian horn is blown off. The show opens with the "Xena Theme Song"*  
  
A Deep Voice-  
  
In a time of ancient profs (dun dun dun dun da dun dun)  
  
Homework and Potions (dun dun dun dun da dun da)  
  
A school in turmoil cried out for a hero.  
  
*Instrumental music plays as footage of Hogwarts, Snape's class and kids crying under stacks of homework*  
  
*Footage goes close up on a student in a Gryffindor cloak*  
  
She was Hermione!  
  
A mighty student, foraged in the heat of Snape's class.  
  
The Answers! *Hermione throws her hand in the air, to be called upon* (Ya do da la de da Hermioneee)  
  
The Books! *Hermione is shown, nose is books* (Ya do da la de da Hermioneeee)  
  
The Studying! *Hermione shown under piles of books* (Ya do da la de da Hermioneee)  
  
Her brains would change the classroom!  
  
*Hermione stands, with sword in hand- decked out in Xena outfit*  
  
Ron- Hermione?!? What are you wearing?  
  
Hermione- Ah...nevermind...Did I ever mention to you Ron- that....*begins to sing to the tune of the "Green Acres" Theme Song*  
  
Hogwarts is the place for me!  
  
Magical studies is where I'd be  
  
Pay attention- stay alert!  
  
Keep England, just give my Hogwarts!  
  
*Draco saw Hermione in a Xena outfit from the Slytherin Tower window, and after having to be stunned in order to stop laughing, runs out to the Hogwarts Grounds where Ron and Hermione are.*  
  
Draco- *sings to Hermione*  
  
Dun dun da da  
  
You're queer!  
  
Hermione- *sings to Ron- oblivious of Draco*  
  
Dun dun da da  
  
I love it here!  
  
Draco- *sings*  
  
Dun da da  
  
Mudblood!  
  
Hermione- *signs*  
  
Dun da da!  
  
You're a dud!  
  
Draco- *sings*  
  
You wanna fight?  
  
Hermione- *sings*  
  
With all of my might!  
  
Draco and Hermione- HOGWARTS! WE LOVE YOUUUUUU!!!!! (Dun da da da, dun da da da, dun da da da- DA! DA!)  
  
*After gasping for their breath, Draco turns to Hermione*  
  
Draco- *moonwalks to the "Fraggle Rock Theme Song" (a/n: anyone actually remember this show?!?) and sings*  
  
Dance your cares away! *clap clap*  
  
Worries for another day!  
  
Let the music play! *clap clap*  
  
Down at Fraggle Rock!  
  
Ron- *speaking* What's Fraggle Rock? Are you guys okay?  
  
Hermione- *rebutes to Draco in song*  
  
Work your cares away!  
  
Dancing's for another day!  
  
Work your cares away!  
  
Down at Fraggle Rock!  
  
Ron- Look out a Gorg!  
  
Gorg Hagrid- *sings*  
  
Ah da da da da de do de do  
  
Ah de da da da da dum  
  
Ah da da da da de da dum!  
  
*Changes the tune to the Pokemon theme song*  
  
Got catch em all!  
  
Got catch em all!  
  
GOT CATCH EM ALL!  
  
*speaks* Hey, look- a fraggle!  
  
Draco, Hermione, and Ron- AHHH!!!!  
  
*run off*  
  
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A/N: Alright I know everyone likes my first Episode best...and I admit these episodes are kinda going downhill- but I promise Episode Five will be great. (I just had to do a theme song one first- any excuse to download the Fraggle Rock Theme Song ^_^) 


	5. Episode Five: Hermione's Naughty Pop

A/N: Again, thank you so much for the reviews =^_^= Special thanks to "LlamaChan" who suggested I use "Magic Dance"- that is a LMAO song- EVERYONE go download it NOW! And "catsrule_dogsdrool" for giving me loads of ideas. And "Draco's Thorn" (Ginny as Barbie Girl- brilliant!)  
  
I'm not really into pop, but I tried to tackle doing a chapter with mainly Britney, BSB, and NSYNC (And some "Magic Dance" for us oldschoolers). If I screwed up any lyrics- don't Avada Kedavra me. I hope you pop fans (and unpop fans alike) enjoy this ^_^  
  
Keep Reviewing ^_^ I'll keep writing.  
  
Again- like I always say- this fanfic was meant to be SANG- not read.  
  
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*The new DADA teacher, Professor Timberlake has a slightly different approach to teaching than the professors before him. The class is beginning to suspect not is all as it appears- something is definately up.*  
  
Professor Timberlake- Good morning class, welcome to DADA...Which stands for...er...De- dark- drink-  
  
Hermione- Defense Against the Dark Arts. *rolls eyes*  
  
Professor Timberlake- Um...Yes, Thank you...Now...  
  
Hermione- Now you begin the lesson.  
  
Professor- Lesson...er...right...um...*leans to whisper in Hermione's ear* But I don't have a lesson. I'm not excately your real professor.  
  
Hermione- *whispers back* I kinda figured that out. Just improv- do your own thing.  
  
Professor- Do my own thing? I like that...Alright class- I was just wonder if any of you wondered why?  
  
Class- Huh?  
  
Professor Timberlake- *takes off his clothes to reveal a very 'NSYNC'y outfit.*  
  
Dirty Pop! *Hermione laughs and flicks her wand so background music fills the room.*  
  
*sings* Do you ever wonder why  
  
This music gets you high  
  
Takes you on a ride  
  
This must be-  
  
Class- POP!  
  
*Upon Hermione's spell, the class jumps up and dances along with Professor Timberlake- who winks at Hermione.*  
  
Class- *sings*  
  
Feel it when your body starts to rock  
  
And baby you just can't stop!  
  
When the music is all you got  
  
This must be pop!  
  
*Snape barges through classroom doors to see what all the commontion- and singing is about. There shouldn't be singing in school! But...Hermione gets to him to- flick! swish! He's under the spell- He immediately turns to face Harry Potter.*  
  
Snape- Hmm....*sings to Harry that crazy song "Magic Dance" From Labryth, as drums play in the background.*  
  
You remind of the baby.  
  
Harry- What baby?  
  
Snape- The baby with the power.  
  
Harry- What power?  
  
Snape- POWER! You do.  
  
Harry- Who do?  
  
Snape- You do!  
  
Harry- Do what?  
  
Snape- Remind me of the baby.  
  
Harry- *Adjust his glasses proudly and says* I am the Boy who Lived, you know.  
  
Justin Timberlake (opps- I mean...Professor Timberlake) - *jumps over to the 'star' Harry and belts out another melody.*  
  
And they say  
  
He's so lucky  
  
He's a star!  
  
Harry- *sings slowly*  
  
But I....cry, cry cryyyy  
  
In my lonellllyyyy hearrrtttt  
  
*wipes tear from his eye*  
  
Show me the meaning of being lonely.  
  
Is this the feeling I need to walk with?  
  
Professor Timberlake- *speaking in utter disguist* Ah, Harry- Exnay on the Ackstreet Bay Oys Boy, okay? Or...*sings* (A/N: Old school!)  
  
Do you really want to hurt me?  
  
Do you really want to make me cry?  
  
Hermione- *who has a little secret...she was the one who somehow ended up pulling a member of NSYNC to Hogwarts- some charm of some sort- was drooling at a saddened Justin- impulsively she shouts out*  
  
SHAKE YOUR BON-BON!  
  
SHAKE YOUR BON!-BON!  
  
*The class again breaks into crazy song and dance.*  
  
Class- *shaking their bon-bons*  
  
Shake your bon-bon!  
  
Shake your bon-bon!  
  
*Suddenly the charm on Justin wears off, and instead of a shaking Justin- we have a startled Justin.*  
  
Justin- Ahh! Ahh! Where am I? .... I want Britney!  
  
Hermione- It's okay Justin- I mean Professor Timberlake. I just have to cast another spell on you. *begins to sing*  
  
I put a spell on you!  
  
And now your mine!  
  
I put a spell on you!  
  
Harry- *interrupts Hermione* HERMIONE! You kidnapped this poor guy?  
  
Hermione- *blushes* Ah...no...Alright...Alright, I'll put a memory charm on him and send him back.  
  
Justin- Er...Help me! Please....  
  
Ron- *ahem* Hermione!  
  
Hermione- Alright! I'll take the spells off you guys too. So sue me- what girl doesn't want to be part of a musical?  
  
********************  
  
There we go ^_^ All done...Hope you somewhat enjoyed it.  
  
Still to come in future episodes...  
  
-Ginny singing "Barbie Girl"  
  
-Annie  
  
-We are the Champions  
  
-And many more... 


	6. Episode Six: Bad Kiddo Contracts

A/N: Sorry I haven't updated in a while- but here it is- a BRAND NEW EPISODE of Harry Potter Broadway Style!

  
  


********************

  
  


*In a dark, cold lair, Voldemort sits on a cold stone with his evil sidekick, Wormtail.*

Wormtail- So...Voldemort, what are we going to do today?

  
  


Voldemort- The same thing we do EVERYDAY!

  
  


Wormtail- Oh yes, yes...Break out in song and dance?

  
  


Voldemort- No, Wormtail- we are going to plot to take over the WORLD!

  
  


Wormtail- Oh wondrous decisions Dark Lord! ...Why exactly are we going to do that?

  
  


Voldemort- BECAUSE Wormtail! BECAUSE! *drums and a keyboard sitting in the cold lair begin to magically play.*

  
  


*Voldie holds up his black cloak as he moonwalks*

  
  


I'm bad! I'm bad! 

You know it!

I'm bad! I'm bad! 

I'm really bad!

And the whole world has to answer right now

Cause I'll you once again- who's bad!

  
  


Wormtail- You're bad! You're bad, Dark Lord! *sings the P. Diddy song 'Bad Boy For Life'*

  
  


We ain't going nowhere

We ain't going nowhere

We can't be stopped now, cause it's BAD BOYS FOR LIFE!

  
  


Voldemort- *looking at Wormtail like he's the loser he is* What ARE you DOING?

  
  


Wormtail- Gettin' down wit it!...Bad boy lingo?...Okay...I'll be quiet...It's just your so *sings*

  
  


Bad, yeah bad- you know it!

  
  


*Suddenly, Voldemort's dark lair doors fling open, revealing Harry, Hermione and Ron dressed in 'Blues Brother's' type attire.*

  
  


Harry/Hermione/Ron- *sing*

  
  


Bad boys, bad boys

What you gonna do?

What you gonna do?

When Dumble comes for you?

  
  


Voldemort- Dumbledore? He's...He's coming to get me?...

  
  


*As Voldie shivers in his corner, with Wormtail, and Harry and co. play with their funky sunglasses- Dumbledore busts a move into the lair.*

  
  


Dumbledore- *singing Madonna's 'Like a Virgin'*

  
  


I made through the wilderness!

Somehow I made it through

Didn't know how lost I was until I found you! *points at Voldie*

  
  


Voldemort- *shivering, sings*

  
  


Do you really want to hurt me?

Do you really want to make me crryyy?

  
  


Dumbledore- All I want is- *takes out his wand and instead of Avada Kedavraing Voldie- he uses his wand as a microphone and sings*

  
  


R-E-S-P-E-C-T!

Show me what it means to me!

R-E-S-P-E-C-T!

  
  


Everyone- *sings*

  
  


RESPECT!

Just a little bit

When I get home

Just a little a bit

RESPECT!

Just a little bit 

When I get home

Just a little bit!

  
  


Epilogue: All members of the end chorus decide they all need a little more respect...

  
  


Harry- HEY! *waves his arms* YES! YOU- FANFIC WRITER! E.M.C! 

  
  


Me (E.M.C)- Huh? Why did you stop dancing and singing?

  
  


Hermione- Well that last song got me thinking-

  
  


Ron- *mumbles* What else is new?

Hermione- I need respect! It's degrading having me prancing around like some Broadway bimbo- I'm HERMIONE GRANGER!

  
  


Me- What? Huh? You guys, people are reading this- please just finish the story.

  
  


Hermione- Urgh! No- that's it! I'm calling my agent!

  
  


*Hermione and gang leave the set...leaving this fanfic writer dumbfounded.*

  
  


Me- Oh man...What am I gonna do? I gotta finish off the story...but there's no characters left except- Hey wait! Wormtail, what are you still doing here?

  
  


Wormtail- My life is in the limelight! How about it? Why don't I wrap things up with a spectacular solo? Huh? Huh?

  
  


Me- Rrr...Ah...Fine...I suppose...*hits hand on forehead*

  
  


Wormtail- Ahem...*sings*

  
  


And I- IIIIIIIIIIIIII

Will always love you! YOUUUUUU!!!

  
  


Me- *whispers to reader* Well I think it'd be best for EVERYONE if I just cut this episode short. See ya- er...next time?

  
  


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A/N: Hope you enjoyed =^_^= Reviews welcome! Thank you all for your great reviews! Special thanks to catsrule_dogsdrool for the awesome suggestions!

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	7. Episode Seven: Leader of the Pack (Va-ro...

  
  


A/N: After a GRUELLING day of exam study, I decided to give my mushed brains a vacation and write another *drumroll* Musical Episode. Bear with me, it may be a bit hard to follow. Words in brackets are what the fanfic writer types. 

  
  


Thanks for all your reviews=^_^= Please keep 'em coming.

  
  


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Fanfic writer types: Harry, with sweat on his brow and determination in his eyes, takes out his wand and point's it straight at his archenemy Voldemort.

  
  


A strange smirk appears across Voldemort's wretched face. This is the moment.

  
  


Voldemort- This is the moment I have been waiting for! MWAHAHAHA! Say your prayers Harry!

  
  


Fanfic writer types: The two stare in each other's eyes, fixed on the hatred burning deep within the pupils...Then, instead of using their wands the conventional way, they turn them into...MICROPHONES! And begin singing-

  
  


Harry- War! Huh!

What is it good for?

Absolutely nothing!

  
  


Voldemort- War! Huh!

What is it good for?

Absolutely nothing!

  
  


Harry- *now realizing he's singing* Wait a minute! What are we doing?

  
  


Voldemort- Huh? Wait- why would I be singing at a time like this? I've been waiting forever to face off to Harry!

  
  


Harry- It's the Fanfic writer's fault! She's nuts! Every time we face off, she has us breaking into song and dance- well I've had ENOUGH!

  
  


Fanfic Writer- Uh...Come on, Harry! It's funny!

  
  


Voldemort- No, not funny- warped. Plain ol'warped.

  
  


Fanfic writer- Well everyone needs a bit of warped humour every now and then. *mumbles* especially during exam time...

  
  


Voldemort- I refuse to sing! 

  
  


Harry- As do I!

  
  


*The two leave from the Fanfic writer's imagination.*

  
  


Fanfic writer- Fine! I don't need you...I can amuse the readers myself. *She dodges tomatoes thrown by the readers as she sings opera.* Okay...okay...Don't waste good produce! I'll find someone to be in my fic...I know! Oliver Wood! Everyone loves him, right?

  
  


(Oliver Wood appears and begins singing 'I Will Always Love You' to the Fanfic writer.)

  
  


Oliver- Wait! Why am I singing? And where are all these tomatoes coming from?

  
  


Fanfic writer- *blushing pathetically* Oh, um...Keep singing love. The tomatoes are just from the insanely jealous readers.

  
  


Oliver Wood- Love? I don't love you.

  
  


Fanfic writer- This is my fic! Keep singing!

  
  


Oliver- No! You can't make me.

  
  


Fanfic writer- Oh yes I can! I could make you unicycle if I wanted.

  
  


Oliver- Uni-? 

  
  


(Oliver Wood begins unicycling)

  
  


Oliver- AHHH!!! STOP THIS!

  
  


(Oliver Wood decides to admire the Fanfic writer's beauty instead of unicycling.)

  
  


Oliver- I am NOT admiring your beauty!

  
  


Fanfic Writer- You know what? You're NO fun! I'll find a different victim...I mean character.

  
  


(Oliver Wood gives the writer his wand.)

  
  


Oliver- Hey! That's my wand.

  
  


Fanfic Writer- I know, Oliver my love. Too bad I don't know how to use it. Maybe I could cast a love spell. Wait! This is my fic!

  
  


Oliver- A bit BAD fic if you ask me!

  
  


Fanfic- I have had enough of YOU!

  
  


(Writer uses wand to make Oliver disappear)

  
  


Writer- That's better...Now, hmmm....I'll go see what Hermione is doing.

  
  


(Fanfic writer sends herself to the Gryffindor dormitory, where she is babbling on to Lavender about some boring nonsense.)

  
  


Writer- Why did I ever think Hermione would be interesting? *sighs* I know- I'll cast an 'interesting' spell on her!

  
  


(A spell is cast and suddenly Hermione is interesting...Hey! Do I hear the tune of 'Leader of the Pack' filling the room?)

  
  


Hermione- Is she really going out with him?

  
  


Lavender- I don't know...There she is- let's ask her!

  
  


*Ginny enters holding a wand to hands too long for her*

  
  


Hermione- Ginny, is that Harry's wand you're carrying?

  
  


Ginny- Uh huh.

  
  


Lavender- It must be fun flying with him. Is he picking you up after school today?

  
  


Ginny- Nah uh.

  
  


Hermione- By the way, where did you meet him?

  
  


Ginny- *singing*

I meet him at the ninth platform

Turned around and smiled at me

You get the picture?

  
  


Hermione- Yes we see

  
  


Ginny- *singing*

That's when I feel for the Leader of the Pack.

  
  


(Hermione and Lavender snap their fingers, as Ginny sings*

  
  


Ginny- *sings*

  
  


My friends were always putting him down.

  
  


Hermione/Lavender- Down, down

  
  


Ginny- *sings*

  
  


They say he came from a Muggle town!

  
  


Hermione- Hey, what's wrong with that?

  
  


Ginny- *sings*

  
  


My friends told me to find someone new

I had to tell my Harry we're through.

He hugged me and asked me why

And all I could do was cry

That's how I fell for the Leader of the Pack!

  
  
  
  


(The Fanfic writer wipes away her tears...Poor Ginny...She closes her laptop...Til next time!)

  
  
  
  


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A/N: Hope you enjoyed! More to follow...Reviews welcome =^_^=

  
  
  
  
  
  



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